what happens.

I have noticed that my blog has shifted. Shifted from one type of writing to another. In the beginning it was about
her therapy.
her meds.
her stages.
now I gear it more towards the future. You never hear about the autistic kids who grow up.
the ones who age out.
where do they go once they hit middle school and beyond.
who helps them once they have decided, as their own person, THIS IS WHO I AM.
no amount of therapy will change her at this point.
change is not what i was going for. just living is what i was going for. Maddux is who she is. there is no need for the "model student" to be near her bc we have established "HER"
Do i care if she looks at me in the face when i talk to her... no. do i care if she stims when she sees wheels on a car. no. it is her. why is there therapy to make it stop. why does she need to look at my face when i say hello. she talks to me better when she doesn't. heck she talks to me better through an ipad. her texts are hilarious. she can text me all day and not say one word and I AM OKAY with it.

they grow up
they become who they are very quick in life. quicker than a typical child
they do not have time to figure it out. they have more of life figured out at age 4 than we do at age 40.

with all this information you have to decide: which path will help her be who she is, the way she is, and create a lasting life long after I am gone.

Leaving middle school gave me one IEP to decide where she will go from here after high school graduation. will she get a typical degree 4 years from now or will she get a vocational degree. setting the stage for her college career, if any, and life career. at the end of 8th grade i am to set her path. WHAT? but true. all the years of therapy all the years of extra help and CA classes and anything ever done in her life led us to this one IEP.

So knowing maddux from day 1, seizure 1, autism day 1... to now she mapped out her path for me. I know what she can and cant do...to a certain extent. she has shown me what she needs to survive in school. she has shown me academically what she is capable of and in her home life... i am still learning. for now.... we move on based on her cues.

we take her away from the kids she has known since kindergarten. away from the school system who has helped us get her here and we put her somewhere smaller. a place where she is still allowed credible academics but with less noise, smaller class sizes and we pray.

welcome to your new world maddux. i am ready. you are ready. now lets see what happens.